Arizona

So here I am down in Arizona. Not exactly how I expected to visit my Grandparents but its been really good to be around family lately. They are all very much here for me. They have been encouraging me and filling me with confidence in my self. Their house is so nice. They even have a saltwater pool and like 6 rooms in this house. My Grandma is already talking about leaving in a few years. What?! You're almost 80 thats crazy Grandma. I love you but stop doing so much all the time. Enjoy your new life. Tonight I realized something though. I love my grandparents with all my heart. They are everything to me. However what I realized is that my family is really judgemental. I don't know what it is or why but they are. Every little thing there is a comment especially if something is wrong. Maybe its their age maybe its the christian in them. I have no idea. But it made me realize something about myself because I also tend to judge people and things. I don't want to be that way. I know it can't be helped at times but I don't want to have it be a consistency in my life. People are who they are. You can't change them only influence them. Tonight was a bit upsetting because we went to my aunts BDAY party and she made everyone a nice meal. They were such a fun and personable family. The joked with each other and shared good times. But my grandparents could NOT stop criticizing every last little thing. It was hard to have a good time. I wish our immediate family could be a little more like them. They all seem so close. My immediate family has its moments but they really get a long well. I hope when I have a family some day I can be like them. I want my family to feel like they can be themselves. Now I see why so many of us have confidence and anxiety issues. Constantly worrying about the people who raised you feel about what you're doing is stressful. I dont want to be critical about this, I just wish they would loosen up a bit. I love my grandparents.